Kensington Capital FC
Aggressive acquisition of youth. Aggressive amortisation of youth.
- Ticker
- KEN.L · London
- Listing price
- £173
- Valuation
- £12.8bn
- TokTok reach
- 63.9M (63,900,000)
- Membership
- Permanent founder member
- Domicile
- London, England
- Owner
- Kensington Capital Partners VII LP
- Colours
- #1E4C9A / #C9A227
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1.History, as approved by the compliance team
A west London club whose identity was reorganised around a spreadsheet in 2023 and never reorganised back. Between 2023 and 2034 it signed one hundred and eleven players under the age of twenty-three on contracts averaging eight and a half years, a strategy the accounting profession described as "creative" and PEFA described as "visionary".
The permanent seat was awarded in 2035 without a vote, on the grounds that unwinding the amortisation schedule would have destabilised four sovereign wealth funds. The club’s stated ambition is to win the Superior League before its 2019 signings finish depreciating.
2.Designated rivalries
The Armory Group
White Hart Loan FC3.Disclosed risk factor
Squad size exceeds the number of available shirt numbers.
Figures are listing figures as filed on admission, stated after the 2036 broadcast settlement. TokTok reach is printed on every asset, as the PEFA™ media kit requires. Past performance is irrelevant.